Wednesday, March 28, 2007
alas its only a mere 3 days till i leave and frankly im not looking forward to it. im actually looking forward to getting it over and done with so i can finally move on to the hobie.
new harness!
yea.. anyway.. been slowly packing my bag and every time i look at it i say to myself,"Damn is this really my bag?? Its HUGE."
im not used to carrying such big luggage around let alone spend my trip with 14 other loony characters. so yes. fendi = not used to carrying big bags.
have you guys heard the new my chemical romance song?
-i dont love you-
its so cliche yet, i love it.
the words are very emotional and bring tat "wow" in a song. and every time i listen to tat song, it makes me wanna think of her. and yet. i still do love her.
here are the lists of songs that constantly remind me of her:
1. Its not over - Chris Daughtry
2. Ohio is for lovers - Hawthorne Heights
3. I dont love you - My Chemical Romance
4. Your guardian angel - The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
5. Just enough to love you - Bayside
so yes, every time i hear these few songs, i cant help but keep remembering of that saturday. that saturday when she made me the happiest guy on earth. although it was only a few hours of arcade, a movie (ms potter i rmb..), the a slow walk to her bus stop and a long, intimate bus ride to her home.. how can someone forget smth like tat? its basically impossible to do so. so what she has done is, etched the memory into my heart, played me on for a few more days then leave me to rot. surely such a small, cute, perfect girl couldnt do this to me? its just strange i tell u.
its the way her eyes sparkle each time i gaze into them.
its the way her soft silky hair gets blown with the wind.
its the way her smooth soft skin touches mine.
its the way shes more ticklish than me.
its the way her name just rolls off my tongue.
its the way she looks at me through the top of her glasses.
its the way she whispered sweet words into my ears those times we were alone.
she left me with nth but memories, a rotting heart and a scratch on my left forearm.
the scar still remains. i serves as a memory of her. as long as that scar is there, she will forever be in my mind and heart.
she's my inspiration. the reason why i live on. the reason why i sail hard.
and the reason why im gonna win worlds.
For you, Angelfish.
evanesco...
10:50 PM.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Woe to you, oh earth under seige.
For the devil sends the beast with wrath
because he knows the time is short.
Let him who have understanding
reckon the number of the beast.
For it is a human number.
His number is Six hundred and sixty six.
evanesco...
2:26 PM.
this post shall be devoted to anything emo cuz well, i feel that way today.
cuz she point blank ignored me today.
has anyone heard of the song Chop Suey by System Of A Down?
they have such emo phrases which i should point out as follows:
"Well I don't think you trust in
My self-rightous suicide
Why cry when angels
Deserve to die"
such strong, passionate words used.
also,
"Father, into your hands
I command my spirit
Father, into your hands
Why have you forsaken me
In your eyes
Forsaken me in your thoughts
Forsaken me in your hearts
Forsaken me"
these lines never fail to bring me back to life. every single time i hear this song i just feel like i actually dont lead a happy life and i can list down a few reasons below;
1. The feeling of constant loneliness never fails to linger over me.
2. I am not rich. Repeat: I AM NOT RICH.
3. The love of my life is barely talking to me. Let alone come near me.
4. I don't even know if i have real friends or not.
5. My life revolves around one thing: SAILING. Without it i'm nothing.
wad a hazardous life i lead.
The thing that sucks is that i carry on with my life as though it is pretty good when its not.
I have people coming up to me and saying;
wow.. 7 regattas to your name fen..
or
ooh.. going worlds fen..
or
damn.. goin hobie fen..
or
walau.. top byte sailor fen..
BUT CMON. WAD DO THEY ALL HAVE IN COMMON?
one word
SAILING
isnt it a lil bit on the boring side? i mean geez. im a good sailor so wad. i can name u a few f-ing good sailors.
Justin/Sherm
Nick DeCruz - Byte World Champ 06
Colin Cheng - Asian Games 06 Gold Medalist
These are the people that should be UP THERE. We should all look up to them. And they all have one thing in common. They are all really humble. Never arrogant.
so there.
ive spoken my peace.
"Champions are MADE, not BORN."
till next time.. cheerios..
evanesco...
12:49 AM.
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Who listened all those times, when you were feeling low?
Who sat beside you in rough times and helped you where to go?
Who cried when you cried, and helped away the tears?
Who tried to stay next to you, and help you with your fears?
Did you forget, That I gave you my heart?
After you left, My whole world came apart.
Did you forget, all those nights we had?
And all those times I said I loved you, now it makes me sad.
Did you forget, when you called I was there?
I always helped, when you were in despair.
Well I remember all those times I made sure you were ok.
Cause if I get to see you smile once, it will be a better day.
You are now gone, but the memories still last.
It is hard to put the ones away with love, that’s in the past.
But you can still call, I will still be there.
It will still be like before, I will always care.
And remember it wise, or you will regret.
Because I will always be there for you, or did you forget?
doesn't it just melt your heart?
evanesco...
9:57 PM.
darn all these dumb assignments.. do i really have to put up with this? i mean cmon.. we have essays, organizational plan, marketing plan, reflective journal, and the list goes on.
lets just hope none of the lecturers know my blog =)
anyway,
FENDI'S BACK HURTS TO THE CORE
and i really really hate it. like pain. misery. ouch.
oh wells. like today i was on the powerboat driving for mabel then everytime the boat bounce a bit only my back pain. like WTSHIT la.. den worse is when i sailed collin's boat for a while, (val's sail btw =P), i couldnt even hike la. my back like uber pain. but heck. hope it heals by worlds then.
walau then i let zach use my sail rite cuz i trust him not to capsize and wet it but then sabrina tiong used my boat and guess wad happened?
she capsized on the ficking downwind... argh...
to add to my misery, guess who im rooming with in worlds?
christopher wong tze yang
but heck la. i dun care who my roomie is. as long as he's not an idiot. so i got 3 ground rules.
1. Don't talk to me unless its important and i won't talk to you.
2. Don't tell me my music is loud cuz i like it that way
3. You stay on your side of the room i'll stay on mine.
but wells im still happy because... NEXT WEEK HOLIDAY LIAO..
but monday and friday night still got class la.
plus i have an assignment due on monday 5pm.
boo.
so yes. fendi's life is alright so far.
except for the fact that she is still not talking to me and avoiding me.
till next time then.. cheerios..
evanesco...
9:51 PM.
isnt it outstanding how one teeny weeny bit of peer pressure gets to u real fast?
trust me i'd know.
anyway, someone, somehow, someway, motivated me into starting a blog for like no apparent reason so yea. amazing buggers u ppl are. so yes. BLOGGING.
its kinda hard to put "fendi" and "blogging" together huh?
i shall not be like those ppl who blog every single day. cuz frakly i cant anyway. =) yeah. woohooo.
so yes. i quote from my dear fren and fellow son of ipswich,
"I have a vision: introspectivegambit.blogspot.com will be a happy place. A positive place, where the journey of life is appreciated and Love is spread, where insights on the meaning of life are shared, and where fen's thoughts are voiced."
adapted from mxr-shen.blogspot.com (2007) Michael Shen XuangRong.
*miss angela would be so proud i referenced
till next time ppl.. cheerios..
evanesco...
1:47 AM.
